Thursday, December 30, 2010

My first uninvited belly touch.

When you are pregnant, something you will need to deal with are people who want to touch the belly.  Well, actually, not everyone wants to touch the belly.  You have all sorts of different people when it comes to pregnant belly touching.

Here is what you get:
1.  Strangers who will approach you and ask.  It's great if they ask, but what if you weren't pregnant?!
2.  Strangers who just come right up and place their hands on you.
3.  Family/friends who ask.
4.  Family/friends who just come right up and touch.
5.  People who think it's icky to touch and don't want to even if you tell them they can.  (my sister falls under this category, she thinks it's gross to let people touch you and she doesn't want to do the touching either haha)
6.  Your partner, who usually doesn't touch but you grab his hand and put it on your belly when the baby is moving, because this early on in my pregnancy I still think it's neat and I want him to feel it too.  :)
7.  Your doctor who measures the "Fundal Height" (how big the uterus is).

I have had experiences with 3, 4, 5, 6 and 7.   I think this is mostly because it's still difficult to tell that I am pregnant.  I have just started my 7th month of pregnancy (yesterday was day one!) and I'm really just starting to show.  Maybe I will do another belly picture soon.  One of my pregnancy emails suggested doing a photography session of my belly but all I could think was "what for?".   I really don't have much to show for it.  I hope my future daughter isn't disappointed that I don't have more belly pictures in case she ever wants to see them.  I just don't see anything worth taking a picture of. :)

So let me tell you about my experiences.  Number 7 is pretty funny.  At my last appointment (not yesterday's appointment) the doctor was measuring my fundal height and the baby was kicking at her the whole time.  And when she used the fetal doppler, the baby would kick at it and then move...I don't think the baby liked it.   We didn't have a lot of movement during yesterday's appointment, but I think that is because I was hungry.  I had to do the gestational diabetes test (my instructions were to fast for four hours before the test) and my appointment was first thing in the morning.  I hadn't eaten anything since the night before, so I think that contributed to the baby being quiet.   I have also decided that not letting a pregnant woman eat is about the meanest thing you can do to a pregnant woman.  I turned irrational, crabby and I nearly passed out at the doctor's office.   When I was finally allowed to eat again (you need to drink the orange stuff, wait one hour, get blood drawn, THEN you get to eat) I got a milk and an egg and cheese wake up wrap from Dunkin Donuts.  The moment I drank some milk all my senses returned to me. 

And then I realized just how horribly mean I had been to my husband that morning.  I was really awful.  I was upset because the living room was a mess and I was probably crabby from no food and I also have a head cold.  I was pretty unhappy.  But once I had food in my system, I immediately realized this and I called him to apologize.  I also took him out for lunch.  The best part about my husband?  He puts up with me!  How lucky am I?  (okay, okay, so there are MANY great things about my husband, but definitely high up there is that he puts up with me.)

Experience number 6 I believe I have already mentioned in a previous post.

Experience number 5 is my sister.  I have invited her to touch a few times.  (especially because she likes to tease me that I am faking my pregnancy)  But she refuses to touch.   Which is fine, I prefer not to be touched anyway. :)

Experience number 3 was my co-worker who asked while reaching at the same time.  I think I reacted pretty quickly by putting my hands on my belly, and I told her no, but only because there was no movement and it would be pretty boring.  I promised her that if there was movement I would come back so she could feel it, but I wasn't at that office for very long and so there was no touching.  I should probably try to control my reaction better, I probably seemed over-protective.  I really don't think I would have minded, but the request caught me off guard.

And experience number 4 is probably the best/funniest/cutest one.  This is because on Christmas Day I had someone touch my belly without asking.  And there was nothing I could do about it.  I was reclining on the couch and holding my belly because the baby was kicking quite a bit.  Basically I was taking a rest and enjoying the kicks.  And my four year old niece walks over, smiles shyly at me and puts her hand on my belly.  It was too cute and I couldn't get mad about it.  :)

So what advice would I give for wanna-be belly touchers?  Here ya go:
1.  If you don't know the person is pregnant, don't assume!  Start chatting with them, if they want you to know they are pregnant, they will bring it up.   If they do, ask about the baby, how they are doing, and then ask permission while keeping your hands at your side, don't reach while asking!
2.  ALWAYS ASK!  Don't reach until after you have been given permission.
3.  Ask if the baby is kicking at the moment, a belly touch is pretty boring unless the baby is moving.

Did I mention you should ask first?  :)

I hope you all enjoyed my belly touching post.  I have three more months to go, a huge belly to grow and a baby shower to go through as well.  Hopefully I can get some more stories to post about belly touching.

Have a Happy New Year!


Sarah (Linderme) Xavier said...

I finally had to post a comment. I've been quietly lurking reading your blog for a little bit (I think I came here originally from a blog TC posted on facebook or maybe from Tara) but anyway I'm about a month behind you in my pregnancy (6 months tomorrow) and it's amazing how many of the same experiences we've had! LOL. Everything from losing weight right before getting pregnant and how hard it is to gain it back even though it's a good thing, to now the belly touching thing lol. Christmas was also my first unrequested belly touch - actually there were two! Two different aunts touched...and one of them, when I told her I'd rather she not, told me I couldn't keep her from touching her nephew! Anyway, I just wanted to let you know I'm here and I'm enjoying your blog. Congrats on the baby!

Dani said...

Hey Sarah!

Great to hear from you and wow! Another baby I can add to my list! When is your due date?

I'm glad to hear I am not the only one going through some of these things, it's really nice to know so many women going through pregnancy at the same time. :)

Sarah (Linderme) Xavier said...

I know, it seems like everyone I know is pregnant!

My due date is April 22nd so potentially an Easter baby since Easter is so late this year =)

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